Talk to a Stranger • Change the World • Part I

Yes that’s right! Talk to a Stranger  – Change the World.

Now that’s a tall order. How is this possible – talk to a stranger and change the world? Think changing the world 2 people at a time – you and the stranger.

My newsletter this month is Part I and it includes how to do the challenge. If you try it, I would love your feedback on a survey I’ll send out next in Part II of this series.

I’ve been talking about this idea for years, in my presentations, in my blogs, to clients, to friends….

Three things brought me back to this topic:

• I forget to walk the talk
• We are deeply divided in this country and in this world
• My clients report more and more that they yearn for meaningful and healthy relationships

Let’s explore these 3 for a moment. And then on to the CHALLENGE. Hint: Set a goal to talk to at least one stranger a day for x number of days. The details to follow.

Walk the Talk, Janet

But I forget. This past week, I was in the doldrums. Oh, woe is me! Then I remembered how powerful striking up a conversation with a stranger is. Even a smile as you pass can be a powerful tonic for you and for them.

I was out shopping standing in a slow moving line. I remembered my advice – talk to a stranger. An older gentleman pulled up with his cart. I said did you find what you were looking for? That started a conversation about his love of reading to his grandchildren. This engaged the woman in front of us who had an 18 month old in her cart – along with her purchases. We talked kids, reading, milestones reached and more. When she left us, she said “thanks so much – that was delightful”. We both agreed enthusiastically.

Guess what – that set up the rest of the day for me. Several pleasantries and smiles later in other stores, I came home feeling energized and positive. And, no this wasn’t about retail therapy! I hate to shop.

“When you talk to a stranger, you’re creating beautiful interruptions into the expected narrative of your daily life — and theirs,” says Kio Stark

A Deeply Divided World Full of Strangers

What if you believed that no one is a stranger? We are humans striving for similar goals on this Earth of ours – meaning, connection and personal power. Some of us are just hoping to survive with some dignity.

One of the talks I give is called “Four Ways to Find the One You Are Looking For”. My favorite happens to be Practice Vulnerability with a Stranger.
That’s your challenge this month.

One of the foundations of an authentic relationship is trust! The powerful people who run our world want us to be afraid of others, especially if they do not look like us or are of a different religion or political persuasion. From fear and mistrust comes opportunity for those in power.

It is up to us to create the opportunity to talk with a stranger…to heal and to increase trust. AND to overcome FEAR as we gain a sense of personal power!

We are human; we yearn for meaningful and healthy relationships

My clients often report challenges in their relationships – intimate partner, family, friends. Or they have no meaningful connections at all. There are many ways to move beyond these blocks. Sometimes it takes years…sometimes when your fully committed and open to do what it takes, then it can happen for you more quickly.

The bottom line here is that we all crave connection but years of challenges in our relationships have decayed our trust.

My belief is that by talking to strangers you can make great strides in filling your heart.  A growing belief that you can love and be loved. Seems counter-intuitive doesn’t it? Shouldn’t you be starting at home?

But do you know what you really want and feel and desire? Are you clear enough to risk vulnerability and rejection if you share it with those most intimate to you? Are you able to easily release the emotional baggage that you’ve been lugging around because you haven’t gotten the love and appreciation you want?

You might just say yes to all of these if you make it a habit to reach out with a smile, a hello or a pleasant conversation with a stranger. It takes effort, but the return can be life changing.

If you try the CHALLENGE – I am banking on a shift in your perception of yourself and of others. Talk to a stranger and change the world starting with you and with them!!

For my original post on this topic, GO HERE.

The Challenge – talk to strangers this month – Level I

We’re tribal in nature and still operate on the fight or flight principle if we are afraid of those outside of our tribe. So let’s start you off with baby steps.

1. Set a goal to talk to X number of strangers for X number of days.
2. Now go out and begin your journey:
   • At level I, you can count a smile and a hello as one connection…hoping for a response back. Don’t worry if you are met with a stony face.
   • Initiate a conversation by asking a question or remarking on something you admire – a piece of jewelry or cool shoes.
   • Don’t just go for the “low hanging fruit” – try your greeting with someone who looks grumpy or sad
3. Now record your numbers and jot down some feelings that came up or an experience that really moved you.
4. When Part II – Level II pops up in your e-mail, I’m going to up the challenge – that is going out of your comfort zone…stay tuned and look for the survey.

May you touch many lives and open your heart in the process.

Peace and Comfort,

~ Janet